40 Weeks and Waiting...

Today we hit 40 weeks!!  Jack is officially at the finish line if only he would just come out.  I had a doctor apt today and we have not made much progress since Monday.  I am still 2cm dilated and just waiting....  I am thankful that Jack and I are doing well though.  My blood pressure was perfect today, his heart rate was measured for 10 minutes and was perfect, the fluid level is good, I am having more contractions (but the intensity and regularity still need to increase), etc.

As of now I am on the books for an induction next Thursday July 5 at 5:30pm. However, I am on the waiting list for an induction on Monday July 2.  This means if something opens up my induction will be moved to this coming Monday.

If you're doing the math, a July 5th induction means I would only have about 2 days at home before the rest of my family arrives on July 9.  This is very hard for me to swallow because I have gone from thinking I might have 3 weeks to recover before they come, to 2 weeks, to 1 week, to 2 days.  Same goes for time off with Jack before going back to work. I've gone from possibly having 10 weeks off before work starts back up, to 9 weeks, to 8 weeks, to 7 weeks.  It's very hard to watch this time go by without him being here.

(Side note: Just to clarify, I don't want to go back to work, but financially I do not have a choice so I just have to get good with it.  At least I only have to go back part-time and for that I am extremely thankful. We also want Jared to have as much time at home too. So instead of him taking a corporate job that pays more but requires him to be gone a lot, we are very content with him staying at the church and coming home every day for lunch and every evening by 5pm and being home every weekend.  This time together is just too precious and money is just not as important. To help maintain these family values we have cut back on everything we could possibly cut back on....We intentionally chose a smaller home so our mortgage payment would be lower, we intentionally drive older, smaller cars that run perfectly fine because they are paid off and don't require monthly payments, we don't buy the latest technological toys/gadgets because the ones we have work well, etc. So regarding me going back to work, this isn't a situation where we could totally afford for me to stay home, but I am choosing to go back to work simply because I love money/lavish lifestyles or that I just want to be at work because I get restless at home so I put my kid in daycare all day every day....that is sooo not me and never will be. I'd much rather make less money and spend as much time at home with my husband and child than make more money and have my kid in daycare or my husband gone all the time... it's just not worth it to me because my heart and values rest in being together instead of making more money. All that to say, I am not looking forward to going back to work, but I have to, and that is why it is so hard to simply watch these days go by realizing that they could have been days that I was able to recover and bond with Jack before work starts again.). 

OK, sorry for the side trail....back to the post....

Even though the time I feel I am losing with Jack is hard, I do not want my frustrations to overshadow my thankfulness that Jack is 40 wks and healthy. When I lost Aliyah, I couldn't stand to listen to a pregnant woman complain about anything because to any complaint she could possibly muster up, I would simply retort, "at least your baby is still alive."  I need to remember that and keep that perspective.  Even if I only have 2 days off before my family comes OR if I only have 7 weeks off before works starts, at least Jack is safe and healthy.... and that is a HUGE HUGE blessing.  Heck, when I think about that, I would rather have a healthy baby and go back to work the same day, than go through what I went through losing Aliyah. Perspective, Perspective, Perspective!!!

Here are the specific prayer requests we have today....

• That Jack would come on his own before Monday July 2 so I do not need to be induced and so I would have more time with Jack before going back to work. Please pray that God would work and move in this!!!
• That Jack and I would remain safe and healthy through the remaining processes.
• That Jared and I would have patience and continue to trust that God is in control.
• That I will genuinely pray "Thy will be done" instead of "My will be done." 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for ALL of your prayers!!  They are MUCH appreciated!!  Hopefully, I will get to do a post soon introducing Jack William Simmons. I can only hope! :)